A Mother Listens

I love the "Chicken Soup for the Soul" books and have quite a few of them. One of my favorites is the one for mothers and daughters. I was thumbing through it the other day and came across this poem I thought I'd share. Hope you like it as much as I do.

A Mother Listens

They are so small and fragile, you are afraid you will

not hear~

you lay awake and...listen.

They are little and just in the next room, suddenly it

is very quiet~

you go to the doorway and...listen.

They are bigger and have much to tell you about

their day~

you are busy and very tired but you make the time

and...listen.

They are a little bigger and so secretive, they do not

say much anymore~

you must find different ways to...listen.

They are teenagers and talk a strange new language~

you try hard to hear without commenting and

just...listen.
They are growing up, all at once they know it all~

it's best to let them think so

and...listen.

They are becoming adults, they want to talk and ask

your advice~

there might be things you do not want to hear, but

you...listen.

They grow up and go away~

you hate the silence, the phone rings, you can't

wait to...listen.

They come to visit with their kids, all demanding

your ears at once~

someone shouts "be quiet!", no it's all right, it's so

wonderful to...listen.

They get older, you get old, they speak loud as if you

are deaf~

it's okay, you nod your head and...listen.

You pass on, and when they pray, they do not ask

for God~

they need to talk to you, God is gracious, and once

again He lets you...listen.

~Carolee Hudgins~

Make it a beautiful day and...listen! ♥Hugs♥

Be Prepared...Have a Tissue Ready!

As I was fumbling through one of my drawers in search of some Christmas letters we've received over the years, I came across a clipping from a newspaper that I'd been holding on to for years. I'd forgotten all about it, so I read over it...and the emotions hit me like a ton of bricks.

Let me just say that for those of us who are parents, we've all had moments when we've said, "Can't our kids just hurry and grow up!" Well, Erma Bombeck wrote this touching article, which originally appeared in 1969. I thought it might move you like it did me...and make you REALLY stop and think what you're wishing for. Trust me...grab a tissue!

Parents, Always Be Careful What You Ask For

A young mother writes: "I know you've written before about the empty-nest syndrome--that lonely period after the children are grown and gone. Right now, I'm up to my eyeballs in laundry and muddy boots. The baby is teething; the boys are fighting. My husband just called and said to eat without him, and I fell off my diet. Lay it on me, again, will you?"

OK. One of these days, you'll shout, "Why don't you kids grow up and act your age!" And they will. Or, "You guys get outside and find yourselves something to do...and don't slam the door!" And they won't.

You'll straighten up the boys' bedroom neat and tidy--bumper stickers discarded, bedspread tucked and smooth, toys displayed on the shelves. And you'll say out loud, "Now, I want it to stay this way." And it will.

You'll prepare a perfect dinner with a salad that hasn't been picked to death and a cake with no finger traces in the icing, and you'll say, "Now, there's a meal for company." And you'll eat it alone.

You'll say, "I want complete privacy on the phone. No dancing around. Silence! Do you hear?" And you'll have it.

No more plastic tablecloths stained with spaghetti. No more bedspreads to protect the sofa from damp bottoms. No more gates to stumble over at the top of the basement steps. No more clothespins under the sofa. No more playpens to arrange a room around.

No more anxious nights under a vaporizer tent. No more sand on the sheets. No more iron-on patches, wet, knotted shoestrings, tight boots, or rubber bands for ponytails.

Imagine. A lipstick with a point on it. No baby sitter for New Year's Eve. Washing only once a week. Seeing a steak that isn't ground. Having your teeth cleaned without a baby on your lap.
No more PTA meetings. No car pools. No blaring radios. No one washing her hair at 11 o'clock at night. Having your own roll of Scotch tape.

Think about it. No more Christmas presents out of toothpicks and library paste. No more sloppy oatmeal kisses. No more tooth fairy. No giggles in the dark. No knees to heal, no responsibility.

Only a voice crying, "Why don't you grow up?" And the silence echoing, "I did."

Need I say more??? As I was typing away, the tears were streaming down my face. Sure hits home when your oldest child is about to leave the nest. All of you who have small kids...enjoy each and every second you have with them because it goes by, oh, so fast!

I'm A MEAN MOM...And Proud Of It!!!!

Care if I vent just a little? Please bear with me, as I have a few things to get off my chest. Here goes nothing!! Brittany, you know how much I love you...but you do give me a lot of great blogging material!

OK, so here's the deal. Last night, if you can believe it, Andrew actually took Brittany out to dinner. Yes, you heard me! Shocking, I know, but it was his 17th birthday. Oh, I was so excited, I could barely sleep a wink the night before! (cough, cough)

Anyhow, Andrew told Brittany that he would pick her up at 5:30. First of all, let me just say that we don't normally allow Brittany to go out on dates during the school week. She has so much on her plate with getting up at 5:15 AM, going to school all day, running 6-8 miles after school at cross country practice, doing homework, etc. Plus, she has to manage to eat sometime and take a shower! I'm sure you get the picture. Secondly, every single time Andrew picks Brittany up to go somewhere, he is ALWAYS 10-20 mins. late. Drives us crazy!! On top of that, the boy can't call her and let her know that he's running behind. She always has to call him and find out what's taking him so long.

So, back to the story! Lo and behold...5:30 rolled around...no Andrew. I told Brittany that I had a feeling he was going to be late. Sure enough, at 5:45, she called him and he said he'd be there in 5 mins. So, he picked her up at 5:50 and they were on their way. Let me just say that when I agreed to allowing her to go out to dinner with Andrew, I made it very clear that they were to go the restaurant, eat dinner, and come home. Brittany even told me that Andrew invited her over to his house to have cake, afterwards, but she told him she couldn't because she had a project to work on. I said that was a very good decision.

Well, around 7:15...no Brittany and Andrew. I sent her a text that said, "Where are you? You need to get HOME!" I don't want to invade her space too much by actually calling her. I got no response...then I saw them walking to the front door at 7:20. Mind you, they'd had a whole hour and a half to spend together and celebrate Andrew's birthday!

So, I'm thinking they'd take a few minutes to declare their undying love for one another and say their goodbyes. Well, 7:45 rolled around and I was trying to fix something on the computer (scary, I know!), so I sent Abby downstairs to tell Brittany to come in the house NOW. She had to do it twice, in fact, before Brittany finally came inside at close to 8:00.

Well, good ol' Mom was not a HAPPY CAMPER. You have to understand that each and every time Brittany and Andrew go out, he always brings her home at the time we say BUT, they sit out on the front porch for anywhere from 30 mins. to an hour talking. Drives us BONKERS!! I mean, it doesn't just happen once in a blue moon, but every single time!! For some reason, it isn't clicking in those teenaged brains of theirs that curfew means the time to be in the house, not standing outside for an eternity!

So, with Chris out of town, I made the decision to ground Brittany from going out with Andrew the entire weekend. The only time she can see him is at the cross country meet tomorrow, which is unavoidable. A weekend without Andrew? Oh, how shall I ever survive? :) When I laid the law down, Brittany complained that I'm treating her like she's 12 years old. Well, until she and Andrew learn to read a clock, that's how it's going to be! Let's see, when the little hand is on the 7 and the big hand is on the 12...

Yes, Brittany wasn't very happy with me. Before she went to bed, though, she gave me the longest, tightest hug ever. She apologized for not listening to me and said she'd work hard to do better. Oh, how I wanted to say that she wasn't really grounded, afterall...but I held firm! I love my girls with all my heart and soul and they are two great kids, no doubt. Chris and I are very fortunate. Thank the Good Lord above! Nonetheless, I think that as a parent, you can't put your desire to be their best friend above being their parent. I'm a firm believer that kids need boundaries.

Trust me, for those of you who don't already know, having a teenager requires lots of patience, understanding, and a good sense of humor. Plus, it often makes you realize that your parents knew way more than you gave them credit for when you were growing up.

So, I guess I've earned the title of MEAN MOM and I must admit...I'm pretty proud of it! :)