A Love Letter To Mom

Dear Mom,
I woke up this morning with you on my mind, as I so often do.  Today was different in that it's the 11-year anniversary since you've been gone  I have such a difficult time believing it's been that long.  Brittany was only 8 years old and Abby was just 4 when you passed away.  I, of course, was a full grown adult and even though you might think that I had life all figured out by then, I really didn't.  There was so much more, Mom, I needed to share with you and learn from you...SO MUCH MORE.

What I'd give to have you here to see the remarkable young women Brittany and Abby have grown up to be.  You'd be so proud of them, Mom, I just know it! They both have your love for life, laughter, family, and God.  We talk about you all the time.  I'm so thankful they still have a lot of memories of times spent with you.  They remember the "prizes" you used to always have for them whenever we'd come for visits and how we'd go to your bedroom with a big bowl of popcorn and watch movies together. More than anything, they remember your warm and loving heart and how you always made them feel like they were the most special grandchildren in the whole, wide world.  I'd give anything for you to be here to see them get all dolled up for dances and dates and to see them walk down the aisle one day and have families of their own.

You know what's funny, Mom?  Often when I look in the mirror, it isn't myself I see.  I see you in my eyes and in my face.  It's as though you're the one staring back at me. I like to think that the older I get, the more I'm beginning to look like you.  I used to tell you all the time what beautiful skin you had...and you did.  In fact, every time I get a whiff of Oil of Olay, I think of you and how you would slather it on your face each night before bed. It brings back some warm memories for me and almost makes me feel like you're still here.

I can only imagine how happy you must be up there in Heaven with Dad, Kev, Granny, Grandpa, Uncle Phil, and many other loved ones. You must be rejoicing every single day!  I often think about how wonderful it would be if you could just pay me a quick visit for a little while to let me know how great Heaven truly is.  The problem with that is that I most likely wouldn't want to let you go, even though I know that Heaven is where you'd rather be.

So, on this day of remembrance, Mom, I just want to let you know that I love and miss you dearly, but  that I'm doing OK.  By the grace of God, I'm learning to make it in this world without you.  Your passing has left a gaping hole in my heart that can never be filled. I really hope I've made you proud, Mom. I'm trying to be the best wife and mom I can possibly be, but it's awfully hard to fill your shoes. You were an incredible role model and I'm so grateful for all the life lessons you taught me.  In my eyes, you were the BEST...always will be!

Love you with all my heart!

Your adoring daughter,    


"Death is nothing else but going home to God; the bond of love will be unbroken for all of eternity."~Mother Teresa